Book Club Questions for The Mother Tree

1. Maya and Sloan both use mindfulness to manage flashbacks, Maya to her marriage and Sloan to her childhood abuse. How does being in the present moment help them? Are there times when they are less successful at this and the past interferes with their present? Do you use mindfulness to manage your stress and anxiety? What specific techniques help you stay present in the moment?​
2. Maya creates reasons that Travis wouldn't want to be with her and downplays his actual words and actions. When Maya laments she isn’t spiritual enough to be with Travis, Bay asks her, “Shouldn’t you let Travis make that decision Maya? If he doesn't think you’re right for him why is he taking you out to dinner and putting in all those hours to help you with the Mother Tree?” Why do you think Maya doubts Travis’ feelings for her? Have you ever assumed someone thought less of you even without evidence proving this true?  Why do you think you felt this way?
3. Sloan tells Peter, “… I’ve had a successful career and raised my children mostly alone. I wouldn’t have been able to do all that if I hadn’t dealt with it (childhood abuse). I just need to stop thinking about it and I’ll be fine.” Is Sloan correct, or can you be outwardly successful while still struggling internally? What evidence supports Peter’s claim that she has not dealt with her sexual abuse. 
4. Two of the fundamental roles of a mother are to provide love and safety to her children. Neither Maya nor Sloan received all they needed from their mothers. Maya’s mother was emotionally unavailable due to her depression, and Sloan’s mother was unable to protect her from her Uncle. How did the relationship with their mothers influence Maya and Sloan? How did they ultimately get their needs for love (Maya) and safety (Sloan) met? Have people supported your growth by providing things your mother could not? Who were they? What did they provide for you?
5. When Maya had drama in her life, dealing with an unhealthy marriage and the recovery from Hurricane Katrina, she was satisfied with her work life. When her life becomes more stable she questions the career choices she’s made and says, “I’ve always taken the path of least resistance.” Why do you think Maya stayed in her career in medical records? Why didn’t she realize sooner she was unfulfilled in her work? Can you related to Maya’s choices? How did you end up in your vocation?
6. Growing up with a white father and black mother Sloan didn’t feel as if she belonged, even in her own family where they had three different skin colors. She felt the greatest sense of acceptance when she was with her african american grandparents and great grandmother in Oriental. In what ways do you think the experience of not belonging shaped Sloan’s personality? Do you think Sloan felt a greater sense of belonging after her move to Oriental? Why or why not? When have you felt like you didn’t fit it? How did you react? 
7. Compare and contrast Sloan’s meeting with the women’s circle at her home (Chapter 6) and around the Mother Tree (Chapter 18). What factors contributed to the change in Sloan and the women in the circle? Have you ever changed your first impression of someone after knowing more about their story? Describe that situation. 
8. At the first women’s circle in The Mother Tree, Maya says, “The intention I planted this spring was to get back in touch with who I am and what my dreams are. I think I’ve lost that over the past few years. …I spent much of my marriage adjusting who I was to try and keep Steven happy.” Do you think Maya is on the path of achieving this by the end of the book? Why or why not? Have you ever lost sight of your dreams trying to keep someone else happy? How did you correct this?
9. Do you think Sloan made the right decision by not telling her mother about her Uncle’s abuse? Why or why not?
10. Maya and the women’s circle view the Mother Tree and land around it as sacred. Lilith says, “The sweat, tears and breath (of women past and present) have infused the Mother Tree and ground beneath her with the wisdom and love shared there for over 100 years. We cannot replace that.” Sloan has a different view of the land, “…(I) have cut down hundreds of trees to make space for a building that will serve more people then the trees did. I see this in the same light. …ultimately logging that land will help me create a retreat center that will serve hundreds every year.” Why do Sloan and the women’s circle have different views about the same piece of land? Can you understand both perspectives? Why? What factors change Sloan’s view about the Mother Tree and surrounding land? Do you think land can be sacred? Why or why not? Is there a piece of land or water that feels sacred to you? Where is it?
11. Maya feels a sense of peace when sitting by the Mother Tree but is uncomfortable with in the church setting. She initially looks at her experiences in her circle and Travis’ experiences with traditional religion as incongruent, and a reason that their relationship won’t work. How does Maya’s beliefs evolve as The Mother Tree progresses? How and where do you experience a connection to something greater than yourself?
12. What storyline or theme from The Mother Tree resonated most with you? Why?​